watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
someone owes me an orgasm
honey bunches of taint.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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