my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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