yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Go christen that room with your naked body.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Randomize
