don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Randomize
