don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
