TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
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