Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Randomize
