We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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