How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
this will be a night to untag.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Randomize
