I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Randomize
