I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Randomize
