Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Randomize
