I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
did i just pee glitter
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
