i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
Randomize