Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize
