Already got asked if we're dating
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize
