Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
Randomize
