I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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