I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
bring money and cleavage
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
