yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
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