6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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