god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
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