My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Randomize
