I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
My vagina is officially offended.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
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