After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
