so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
