Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
