a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I wish they made helmets for livers.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
