there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
He called his prostate his "boner button".
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Randomize
