I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
