C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize