why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize