4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
You smell like stripper and shame
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Terrible idea I love it
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
