Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Randomize
