oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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