i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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