i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Randomize
