I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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