That reminds me...we need to get swords
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
