Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Randomize
