the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
...so i touched it.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
i used baking grease as lip gloss
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
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