so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize
