omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
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