He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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