That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
