How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Randomize
