If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Randomize
