It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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