You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
