I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
