how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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